Hello may I have your attention please
For your safety and the safety of others please do not leave any baggage or packages unattended. The Chicago police department will seize any unattended bags and will use them as projectiles in their war on black youths. Thank you and have a great day.
I’m having a really bad flight
I guess I was due for one. Horrible neighbor knitting and elbowin me every 30 seconds. Bad headache. Can’t get out to pee.